I was invited by an incredible lady that I met at church to accompany her to the Immigration Detention Center in Bangkok. I wasn’t sure exactly what we would be doing, but I agreed to go. As we drove to the center I asked for a little more clarification on who these people were and why they were there. Everyone has a different story, but essentially most of the people were fleeing their country seeking refugee status with the UN without initially realizing that, because there are so many refugees, the wait list is 3-4 years before their case will be heard. While they wait, they are separated by gender, regardless of whether they are family or not. If there is a mother with three sons, for example, she is not allowed to see them. The only exception to that rule is during visiting hours. If someone from the outside presents the name of someone on the inside, that person on the inside can come down to a visiting room. If their whole family gets called down, then they can spend that hour together. The catch is that one person from the outside is only allowed one name, so in order for a family of 6 to see each other, they need 6 people from the outside to present their names. We were there to present names of family members so that they could see each other again.

Before we went into the center we went shopping for food and other things the people might need. They aren’t fed well and are only given the bare minimum of everything. Each person got their own bag so we divided all the food into nine separate bags and worked our way in.

I had no idea how hard it would be.

I was given the name of Mohamad Yasin, a husband and father to five sons. They come from Afghanistan. We entered a large factory-like room divided in half by two large fences with a guard pacing between the two sides. There wasn’t privacy, so communication was extremely difficult as a hundred people, mouths pressed to the fence, shouted across the room at each other. One of the boys is my brother’s age, so it was fun getting to know him as best as we could given the circumstances. There wasn’t a whole lot that could be said, but as I looked into Mohamad’s and Alia’s (father and mother) faces, I could see the heartbreak and hardships worn into their beautiful eyes as they held onto each other for the first time in a long while. On top of the pain there was an overwhelming expression of gratitude toward those of us who provided a way for them to be a family again for just one hour on a Monday morning. Unfortunately, because there weren’t enough people, only two of five sons were able to come down to see their mother.

The next family I spoke with is a family of six from Pakistan. They came to Thailand in the hopes of quickly gaining refugee status, only to have all of their resources run out before their case could be heard. Again, they did not realize the wait is so long and, even though they brought everything they had, it was not enough for years and years of waiting. The father decided it was better to turn themselves in to the detention center than to starve on the streets of Thailand. Tears filled my eyes as mother and father thanked us profusely for presenting their names and bringing them food. One of their daughters had a birthday this week and they suggested we sing happy birthday to her. As we belted out “Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you!…” over the crowds of people, the little girl became subject to her emotions and shielded her face as the tears flowed uncontrollably. This is no way for a girl to spend her 13th birthday. I could hardly finish the song without tears filling my own eyes as I watched her father, filled with pain, wrap his little girl in his arms, squeezing her tight and kissing her forehead. They explained that she usually doesn’t cry – she is usually the one telling her mother not to cry saying that everything will be okay. “But sometimes,” they went on, “it is too hard. Now it is her turn to cry.”

As we began to bring our conversation to a close so that the family could have their own time together, their mother asked multiple times if we could bring just one more person next time so that she could see her son. I’m not sure when they were all together as a family last, but I can’t imagine how much it pained her to be forced away from her husband and sons. I promised that we would have more people next time so that their whole family could be together again.

My eyes were opened to a new world that morning as I visited with those beautiful families. The fact is, though it seems unbearable to live in the IDC with hardly any toiletries, terrible food, and separation from family members, it is even worse to stay in their home countries. I saw fathers who wanted to create a new life for their children, a better life than they could provide at home. I saw mothers who ached with pain of separation from family and, even worse, the pain of seeing their children suffer too. But I also saw a hope in each of their eyes that one day they would get to live like a normal family again, all together under one roof. I saw the gratitude in their eyes and hands as they thanked us continuously for allowing them to be together.

I left the IDC thanking God that I was born in America where my family was safe and always had work. I don’t know why I was born in America and they were born in Pakistan and Afghanistan, but I do know that because I have been blessed with so much, I have a responsibility to give as much. I can’t pay the thousands of dollars required to bail out a single family (it’s 50,000 Thai Baht per person), but I can visit people and talk with them and provide them a chance to see their families. In a month I will leave Bangkok and continue on to other adventures in my life and I have a choice: forget those faces and experiences that taught me so much, or remember them and use them to shape my personality and goals. I choose the latter. I hope that you take a second to look around and see how much you have been given in this precious life of yours. Make a goal to give a little more; “For unto whomsoever much is given, of him shall be much required.” And then your life will be full.